Adventurers Present
Bilbo - hobbit
Hugh Kha-Rez - draconian barbarian
Mossmullet - dwarfley tempest cleric
Orsek Ungart - dwarfley barbarian wizard
Red - elfin rogue
SMASH - dwarfley life cleric
The adventures set out this fine morning with a distinct task in mind; finishing the exploration of the tunnels and caverns of Quasqueton. Happily, the goal seemed achievable as long as the party’s progress was steady and substantial. If only there weren’t too many interesting but time-intensive matters like the room of many pools, which required intensive investigation, this dawning day should prove the party’s last in the dark depths of the nigh-endless underground complex.
Alas, there was a bit of a fascinating and diverting complication in each of the first three rooms explored on this day. Starting the day by exploring the map and realizing that there were some inexplicably large blank spaces upon the map, the party spent the first few turns searching for secret doors around these two large blocks of unexplored space. Ultimately, they found secret doors leading into both areas. But not before they attracted the attention of four wandering zombies. The undead put up a good fight, but ultimately fell before the weapons and determination of the living.
Beginning with the first room, the wizard’s workroom, the party encountered lots and lots of options! The workroom contained a table full of many different jars. Most were time-wasting oddities, like gravel or ash. But a few proved truly interesting, and one proved exceedingly valuable. SMASH was thrilled when garlic was discovered and he could sacrifice some to his hamster deity. A jar of cloves was located, which probably had some small amount of value. But most interesting was the jar of poop. Now, it wasn’t just any old poop…oh no! This was dried dragon poop! Mossmullet, the lucky locator of the desiccated dragon doo, attempted to carefully examine the poop to see if it appeared valuable in some way which might explain its preservation. But the fumble-fingered dwarf badly mishandled the nugget, and managed to break it apart. Which turned out to have been the best thing he could have done! Because hidden inside was a single, gleaming gem worth 5,000 gp!
The next stop on the secret rooms of time-consumption tour was the wizard’s lab. It held 5 giant centipedes, which attacked the party as soon as they began exploring. While this group of fearsome explorers has previously tackled much deadlier foes, this particular battle proved rather taxing upon the party. In particular, both rogues were struck by mandibles, poisoned, and knocked unconscious. Red’s poisoning was especially virulent; he was not only reduced to zero hit points, but looked to be knocking loudly at death’s door! Both clerics went to work upon Red, rescuing him from an early entry into the afterlife, while the remaining party members whittled down the numbers of the attacking bugs. The battle was won and the ailing rogues (Lesser) Restored to health, but the mulleted minion of Varga expended most of his divine aid for the day to preserve the party. The room held more fun for the group, with an exploding blast of laughing gas hidden in a crate, and a potion of invisibility (briefly) used up by SMASH.
The final leg of the Trifecta of Time-traps was a room infested with giant crabs. Battle was again entered and survived by the explorers, this time with few serious casualties. Bilbo exhibited his new-found hobbit powers to slough off damage, slipping again and again from the grasping claws of the jumbo crustaceans. When the last claw was disjointed and the final crab cracked, the party broke them apart for an exceedingly tasty addition of daily rations. They were also able to supplement their meal with side-dishes such as pickled herring, ale, and dried fruit taken from the 20 (or was it 10?) casks stacked in this larder. SMASH was again thrilled to find something suitable (root beer!) for sacrifice to his hamster…god. Mossmullet, feeling slightly ungrateful to his fierce patron, idly wondered if she might appreciate the sacrifice of a cannibalistic hamster priest….
From this point on, the pace of exploration sped up substantially, as the weary adventurers attempted to achieve the goal of finally clearing out the mazes of Quasqueton. Some twisty paths, a stupid spiraled corridor, and some Burning-Hands-toasted giant rats later, the group came to a large, interesting, and danger-filled terrarium. Exploring it led to Hugh's sampling mushroom after mushroom, in what looked surprisingly like Russian roulette (never a winning proposition). While it wasn’t clear what god of luck was looking out for Hugh this day, his will must be powerful, for the dopey barbarian suffered no ill effects whatsoever. Less lucky, however, were the 8 prior victims of the Creeper flowers at the back of the room. These large, breezelessly-waving purple and yellow flowers apparently used powerful flower-power to enslave and zombify the minds of humanoids, controlling them like puppet-guardians when the explorers came too near. Orsek opened up with a cone of Burning Hands, while the others engaged the surviving greenie-groupies in general melee. The plant protectors were dispatched quickly enough, except for one taken prisoner so they might attempt to magically heal and rescue him. It was then that Red found the entry in the wizard’s compendium of plant lore (taken the day before from the wizard’s closet, along with the spider-cloak) for the flowers the group faced: the party finally realized the extreme hazard which the Creeper flowers posed. With this revelation, magical attacks became focused upon the overgrown ‘corpse-plants’. Orsek used his fire magic to scorch about half of the frightening plant, and Mossmullet finished it off with a critically-effective Shatter spell. After picking off the smoldering scraps of Creeper, the party focused more upon their captive. Lesser Restoration by the SMASH failed to fully restore the poor zombified plant-puppet, and it became clear that actually healing the man was beyond the party’s collective abilities. So he was put down, as quickly and humanely as possible. Happily, a search of the eight dead zombies revealed a suit of +1 chainmail, and Mossmullet invoked the age-old “Finders Keepers” rule to retain the magical armor. He did beneficently relinquish the +1 shield he’d previously acquired from Fizzlebang. Since the wizard paladin was strangely absent this day, the magical shield went to SMASH. And thus, the party doubled-down upon a growing tradition of passing magical items from one owner to the next.
As the hours grew late, the explorers found their way to the dungeon’s final room, where the previous occupants conducted their conferences and training programs. Pushing aside the chairs, tables, coffee pots and laptop-projectors loaded with PowerPoint presentations about how to force enslaved orcs to painstakingly dig needlessly overlong tunnels and ridiculous spirals into an underground retreat, the group grabbed a silver mirror worth approximately 90 gp.
Returning to the trophy room, the exhausted explorers took stock. They regarded their substantial collection of bulky-but-valuable treasures, and wondered how to possibly return as many of them to civilization (AKA the cash-heavy merchants who might liquidate the haul). It was then that Red remembered the mining carts abandoned down below. Two carts were fetched and loaded with the various large items, with the plan to return to Brambleham on the following morning. With that, the group settled in, secured the room, and drifted off into pleasant dreams featuring the wealth and glory which awaited them upon their triumphant return. Well…more or less triumphant. Nuno Rockhead’s “return”, when SMASH’s gut was through with him, would surely be something far short of “triumphant”…
Party Experience Gained
Combat: 173 each
Exploration: 35 each
