Adventurer's Present
Bilbo, a hobbit
Mossmullet, a dwarfley cleric of winter's bite
Orsek, a dwarfley barbarian wizard
SMASH, a dwarfley cleric of root cellars
We awoke in the tower of the now-felled Necromancer. Having defeated the Necromancer and his minions, as well as destroying the Orb and thoroughly looting the place, all we had to do was go back to Cheddarbend and spend our hard-earned loot...
We encountered a nest of stirges before leaving the tower. These were not a problem. We encountered a mass of zombies trekking across the Tomblands. These also were not a problem (largely due to Mossmullet's new skull ring). Having safely made it to Cheddarbend, that's when our problems began...
The clerics gave most of their loot to their respective churches without fanfare. Orsek was even able to research his Dark Arts without any brouhaha. That left our resident hobbit, Bilbo, to set out a-feasting all on his own (mostly). This proved troubling. First he was robbed of much of the money he had set aside for his bacchanal. He set his shadow in search of the bandits (thanks to his new magic cloak), scrounged up some more lucre and hit the town once more. This time he found himself locked in the pokey for indecent exposure. And it must have been really indecent, because the constable, while perfectly friendly, would not let him go without paying an exorbitant fine. This simply would not do - an escape plan was hatched.
Orsek went around to the prison window (is there always a window?) and, while the clerics kept the constable occupied, cast Feign Death on the hobbit. The police gave us our dead friend's body, but held on to his possessions to cover the fine. That night, SMASH, in the form of a hamster, snuck in and retrieved them. To sneak the still-living hobbit out of town, we gave him SMASH's magic amulet. This turns the wearer invisible to everyone except his true love. SMASH got the amulet super cheap from a curiosity shoppe, and we soon discovered why. The amulet did indeed work, but could not be removed.
Invisible hobbit in tow, we followed his shadow to the bandits camp and mounted an attack. The plan was to spread out and surprise them. Orsek would unleash the dread Finger of Death and we'd all attack. The plan failed spectacularly.
Due to some clumsy dwarfs, surprise was blown. Then, even more impressively, Orsek's spell conjured a huge earth elemental instead of the aforementioned Finger. At least the granite goliath was under his control. Well, until Orsek was shot by the bandit leader, forcing Orsek to lose his concentration. The mobile mountain turned his furious fists on us...
We defeated the bandits (one was able to run off). And even made a dent in the elemental. It pounded Orsek pretty well, then turned his attention on Bilbo. Despite Bilbo's continued invisible status, the mighty elemental landed blow after blow on him. Could he see him? Was this his True Love? After beating him to unconsciousness, he tenderly lifted the little furry-footed one, and made for the hills. A well-timed Shatter from Mossmullet reduced the elemental to rubble, but not before he could put the unconscious hobbit in a safe place - 10 feet underground.
All foes vanquished, we were able to free Bilbo from his rocky nest with a Dig spell from SMASH. We also turned up the bandits' loot, which was all of our stolen money plus more. So now we sit and rest in the bandit's camp, battered and bruised. With an invisible hobbit. Who we can't even be sure is wearing clothes...
Party Experience Gained
Combat: 325 each
Freeing Bilbo from prison: 125 each
21 May 2016
Crazy Days, Stolen Nights [session 26]
Adventurer's Present
Bilbo, a hobbit
Mossmullet, a dwarfley cleric of winter's bite
Orsek, a dwarfley barbarian wizard
SMASH, a dwarfley cleric of root cellars
The winds and whims of the random environs of Cheddarbend blew to and fro this visit by the adventurers. As usual, most of the party’s misfortunes stemmed directly from the smallest (in stature) member: Bilbo the hobbit.
Immediately upon their victorious return to the dyspeptic hamlet, the foursome informed the townsfolk of the success of their quest to rid the land of the Necromancer and his Orb. Naturally, this news was greeted with mild approbation and approval. The adventurers basked in the glow of the love and adulation, for the single day it lasted. No feast of celebration was planned. No parade of rejoicing and merriment occurred. When the clerics injected over 11,000 gold pieces into the local economy via temple donations, no word of thanks resounded. When the wizard bought up rare compendiums and materials to conduct magical research, to the tune of another two or three thousand gold, no outpouring of welcoming resulted.
What did elicit a response from the townsfolk was the feasting and drinking of the victory celebrations…which the heroes financed for themselves. The townsfolk participated in this feasting, by 1) stealing over 1,100 gold pieces from one of the conquering heroes, 2) stealing 210 gold from another of them, and 3) arresting and incarcerating a third for the dastardly crime of public nudity. While that seemed somewhat odd in and of itself, the hospitality of the Cheddarbenders took on an entirely different flavor when they demanded a fine of…FIVE THOUSAND gold pieces, to secure the release of this do-gooding free spirit (Bilbo the Barenaked)!
Needless to say, once the clearly criminal guardsmen suggested this dazzlingly exorbitant and extortionate fine for this seemingly minor offense, the dazed minds of even the kindliest of the adventures turned toward…murder. A number of unpleasant actions were discussed (and discarded) by the unhappy heroes, before they recovered their wits and settled upon merely resorting to trickery and theft to obtain the release of both Bilbo and his belongings. Orsek used his necromantic powers to help Bilbo Feign Death, whereupon Mossmullet and Orsek carried his "corpse" back to their inn (where Bibo made a miraculous and full recovery to life and health). Meanwhile, Smash changed into a hamster, snuck into the constable's storeroom, returned to dwarfley form and recovered Bilbo's possessions, then repeated his transformation, and returned to the inn to reunite Bilbo and his things.
The party next used their powers to scout out and locate the thieves who'd so cavalierly nicked their gold while they celebrated. Bilbo's Shadow Cloak dispatched the hobbit’s shadow to search the town for signs of them, and returned with actionable intelligence. Six thieves were holed up a couple hours outside the town. Stealing away from the ungrateful hamlet in the wee hours, the party used Smash's (Cheddarbend-purchased) amulet of invisibility to disguise their quite-recovered hobbit’s escape. It was only after they slipped out of town that they realized the amulet was actually cursed: Bilbo could neither remove the amulet, nor return to visibility. Undaunted by the setback, the aggrieved adventureres beat a path to the camp of surprised cutpurses, attacking with the dawn's light. What followed was one of the more memorable battles the group had ever fought.
Trying to take maximum advantage of the element of surprise backfired wildly in expedited fashion. Orsek, in what’s becoming something of an unfortunate habit, delved into the Overcasting well once more. Once more, it was done with exuberance and a lack of basic self-preservation: he again attempted to blast a foe with the Finger of Death. What was noticeably different this time was a complete lack of obvious reason to do so. The thieves were unlikely to be a worthy match of the adventurers' combat prowess, and four of them were basically arranged around their campfire like sitting ducks. A quick Shatter spell from Mossmullet blasted three of those ruffians into the next life, before they even knew their peril. The other four were dispatched by the party with little trouble, the main danger being that they might escape with their larcenous lives.
But no danger the group of thieves might present could compare to the danger which the party summoned up for themselves: Orsek's spell failed spectacularly, turning the element of surprise into an Element of Earth! That is, an Earth Elemental. Orsek attempted to control it, but immediately fumbled his concentration. The angry element turned and attacked Orsek, hammering into the wizard with fists like oversized sledgehammers. The brave and risk-loving dwarf flew into one of his famous rages, and began attacking the monster with what can only be acknowledged as the absolutely perfect weapon: his oversized shovel-axe. While the rest of the group struggled to defeat the bandits, Orsek fought valiantly against his self-inflicted opponent. He lasted far longer than any other member of the party might have, but ultimately Orsek was no match for the outraged elemental. Battered into unconsciousness, he fell in battle and began fighting for his life. Plucky and invisible hobbit Bilbo took up the fight, but his foe either could see him clearly or didn’t rely upon sight; he immediately crushed Bilbo into an unconscious sack of (possibly invisible) hobbit. Considering that Bilbo’s other enemy, one of the thieves, also managed to hit the hobbit in combat, it seems possible that only the hobbit's friends have any difficulty perceiving him? Time will tell.
If this botched battle wasn't bizarre enough already, it was at this juncture that the earth elemental essentially declared his undying love for the small humanoid (perhaps as a furry-footed pet?). Scooping up the injured Bilbo, the elemental began beating feet out of the bandits' hollow carrying and tending to his battered new toy. After healing Orsek back to consciousness, the clerics turned their fury upon the besotted rock monster. Smash attempted to restrain it with his grasping roots, while Mossmullet lucked into the happy coincidence of being the exact wrong type of priest for a rocky-but-brittle elemental to fight. His Shatter spells caused the creature to roar in apparent agony, plow Bilbo's ailing body into the dirt, and then turn to fight. A second Shatter spell blew him to bits, leaving only a pile of rubble where he stood.
Confronted with the defeated earth monster's demise, Orsek and the clerics rushed forward to recover their friend. But when they reached the spot the elemental ditched Bilbo into the ground, they realized that what they really needed to do wasn’t to re-cover their companion, but rather to un-cover him. The angry elemental his shoved his unconscious form deep into the very earth itself, leaving not even an imprint behind! While the desperate Mossmullet searched his pack for a shovel, and Orsek prepared to once again undertake a shovel-ready project, crafty Smash saved the (hobbit's) day but imploring his deity Termas the Tunneller to magically Dig aside the offending earth. Bilbo's (still invisible) body was rescued from the earth, and his companions fumbled their unguided hands upon him in healing prayer.
Success in this unexpectedly substantial combat finally won, the group turned to looting the looters. They recovered the vast bulk of their stolen funds, and celebrated with a hard-won long rest in the remains of the bandit camp.
All four of the heroes achieved sixth level this strange and difficult session. Finally powered up enough for White Plume Mountain (they hope), and totally fed up with the greedy and self-centered folk of Cheddarbend, their next steps will surely take them back out into the wilds, and on to their next dungeon crawling expedition in the infamous Mountain. Which, I might add, they still REALLY need to read that book about. You know, the one they found in the necromancer’s tower? Let's hope for their sakes it's a really good read!
Party Experience Gained
Combat: 325 each
Freeing Bilbo from prison: 125 each
Bilbo, a hobbit
Mossmullet, a dwarfley cleric of winter's bite
Orsek, a dwarfley barbarian wizard
SMASH, a dwarfley cleric of root cellars
The winds and whims of the random environs of Cheddarbend blew to and fro this visit by the adventurers. As usual, most of the party’s misfortunes stemmed directly from the smallest (in stature) member: Bilbo the hobbit.
Immediately upon their victorious return to the dyspeptic hamlet, the foursome informed the townsfolk of the success of their quest to rid the land of the Necromancer and his Orb. Naturally, this news was greeted with mild approbation and approval. The adventurers basked in the glow of the love and adulation, for the single day it lasted. No feast of celebration was planned. No parade of rejoicing and merriment occurred. When the clerics injected over 11,000 gold pieces into the local economy via temple donations, no word of thanks resounded. When the wizard bought up rare compendiums and materials to conduct magical research, to the tune of another two or three thousand gold, no outpouring of welcoming resulted.
What did elicit a response from the townsfolk was the feasting and drinking of the victory celebrations…which the heroes financed for themselves. The townsfolk participated in this feasting, by 1) stealing over 1,100 gold pieces from one of the conquering heroes, 2) stealing 210 gold from another of them, and 3) arresting and incarcerating a third for the dastardly crime of public nudity. While that seemed somewhat odd in and of itself, the hospitality of the Cheddarbenders took on an entirely different flavor when they demanded a fine of…FIVE THOUSAND gold pieces, to secure the release of this do-gooding free spirit (Bilbo the Barenaked)!
Needless to say, once the clearly criminal guardsmen suggested this dazzlingly exorbitant and extortionate fine for this seemingly minor offense, the dazed minds of even the kindliest of the adventures turned toward…murder. A number of unpleasant actions were discussed (and discarded) by the unhappy heroes, before they recovered their wits and settled upon merely resorting to trickery and theft to obtain the release of both Bilbo and his belongings. Orsek used his necromantic powers to help Bilbo Feign Death, whereupon Mossmullet and Orsek carried his "corpse" back to their inn (where Bibo made a miraculous and full recovery to life and health). Meanwhile, Smash changed into a hamster, snuck into the constable's storeroom, returned to dwarfley form and recovered Bilbo's possessions, then repeated his transformation, and returned to the inn to reunite Bilbo and his things.
The party next used their powers to scout out and locate the thieves who'd so cavalierly nicked their gold while they celebrated. Bilbo's Shadow Cloak dispatched the hobbit’s shadow to search the town for signs of them, and returned with actionable intelligence. Six thieves were holed up a couple hours outside the town. Stealing away from the ungrateful hamlet in the wee hours, the party used Smash's (Cheddarbend-purchased) amulet of invisibility to disguise their quite-recovered hobbit’s escape. It was only after they slipped out of town that they realized the amulet was actually cursed: Bilbo could neither remove the amulet, nor return to visibility. Undaunted by the setback, the aggrieved adventureres beat a path to the camp of surprised cutpurses, attacking with the dawn's light. What followed was one of the more memorable battles the group had ever fought.
Trying to take maximum advantage of the element of surprise backfired wildly in expedited fashion. Orsek, in what’s becoming something of an unfortunate habit, delved into the Overcasting well once more. Once more, it was done with exuberance and a lack of basic self-preservation: he again attempted to blast a foe with the Finger of Death. What was noticeably different this time was a complete lack of obvious reason to do so. The thieves were unlikely to be a worthy match of the adventurers' combat prowess, and four of them were basically arranged around their campfire like sitting ducks. A quick Shatter spell from Mossmullet blasted three of those ruffians into the next life, before they even knew their peril. The other four were dispatched by the party with little trouble, the main danger being that they might escape with their larcenous lives.
But no danger the group of thieves might present could compare to the danger which the party summoned up for themselves: Orsek's spell failed spectacularly, turning the element of surprise into an Element of Earth! That is, an Earth Elemental. Orsek attempted to control it, but immediately fumbled his concentration. The angry element turned and attacked Orsek, hammering into the wizard with fists like oversized sledgehammers. The brave and risk-loving dwarf flew into one of his famous rages, and began attacking the monster with what can only be acknowledged as the absolutely perfect weapon: his oversized shovel-axe. While the rest of the group struggled to defeat the bandits, Orsek fought valiantly against his self-inflicted opponent. He lasted far longer than any other member of the party might have, but ultimately Orsek was no match for the outraged elemental. Battered into unconsciousness, he fell in battle and began fighting for his life. Plucky and invisible hobbit Bilbo took up the fight, but his foe either could see him clearly or didn’t rely upon sight; he immediately crushed Bilbo into an unconscious sack of (possibly invisible) hobbit. Considering that Bilbo’s other enemy, one of the thieves, also managed to hit the hobbit in combat, it seems possible that only the hobbit's friends have any difficulty perceiving him? Time will tell.
If this botched battle wasn't bizarre enough already, it was at this juncture that the earth elemental essentially declared his undying love for the small humanoid (perhaps as a furry-footed pet?). Scooping up the injured Bilbo, the elemental began beating feet out of the bandits' hollow carrying and tending to his battered new toy. After healing Orsek back to consciousness, the clerics turned their fury upon the besotted rock monster. Smash attempted to restrain it with his grasping roots, while Mossmullet lucked into the happy coincidence of being the exact wrong type of priest for a rocky-but-brittle elemental to fight. His Shatter spells caused the creature to roar in apparent agony, plow Bilbo's ailing body into the dirt, and then turn to fight. A second Shatter spell blew him to bits, leaving only a pile of rubble where he stood.
Confronted with the defeated earth monster's demise, Orsek and the clerics rushed forward to recover their friend. But when they reached the spot the elemental ditched Bilbo into the ground, they realized that what they really needed to do wasn’t to re-cover their companion, but rather to un-cover him. The angry elemental his shoved his unconscious form deep into the very earth itself, leaving not even an imprint behind! While the desperate Mossmullet searched his pack for a shovel, and Orsek prepared to once again undertake a shovel-ready project, crafty Smash saved the (hobbit's) day but imploring his deity Termas the Tunneller to magically Dig aside the offending earth. Bilbo's (still invisible) body was rescued from the earth, and his companions fumbled their unguided hands upon him in healing prayer.
Success in this unexpectedly substantial combat finally won, the group turned to looting the looters. They recovered the vast bulk of their stolen funds, and celebrated with a hard-won long rest in the remains of the bandit camp.
All four of the heroes achieved sixth level this strange and difficult session. Finally powered up enough for White Plume Mountain (they hope), and totally fed up with the greedy and self-centered folk of Cheddarbend, their next steps will surely take them back out into the wilds, and on to their next dungeon crawling expedition in the infamous Mountain. Which, I might add, they still REALLY need to read that book about. You know, the one they found in the necromancer’s tower? Let's hope for their sakes it's a really good read!
Party Experience Gained
Combat: 325 each
Freeing Bilbo from prison: 125 each
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